*****

I don't know what to say or do
its like a fog i cant seem to escape
then idea is there but its like a ghost drifting by
i cant seem to tell how things are going in my mind
like a prisoner in a trapped state of sanity
it drips in my mind like fountain with a leaky hose.
what am i left to give?
my heart races with no destination to go.
and i am left with no clue of who i am
like a ghost in a shell that can not be cracked
like a photograph that has been worn to its final corner.
I do not know where i stand in this disastrously beautiful world.
and this, the voice in my head wont steer me to the right goal.
please oh great mighty one
i ask you to remove my mask and show the world i am more then
what i was cut out to be
please, don't let the shallow waters cover my eyes.
Do not stand at my grave and weep
the head stone was removed for a reason.
a hidden secret to the world
a beauty beyond your understanding.
my heart. was nothing more then a bitter chew toy.
in this place we call,
Home.
But what is home exactly?
a feeling?
a place?
i feel as if home is just out of my reach
like a child with a toy he wants on the top shelf
so close yet not in grasps distance.
I feel that the world around me is falling apart as I take another step
and I cant help but feel the dread that is left behind
bitter footsteps are caught in my past and the raindrops play like drums
on the ground in my memory,
loose ends tied up with barbwire made to tear what was there.
and I am left to repair the empty memories of a long lost idea
the idea we worked on.
The blue prints stick in my mind like a bitter taste that is left in your mouth.
from the poison that you were fed.
I cant help but feel the way I do
but like a cracked wall, i cant handle the pounding pressure in my head
I feel blind to truth
I feel def to the music that I loved
I feel numb to your breath on my cheek
so cold on the inside but i'm melting on the outside.
Like a twisted dream i haunt this world with my one passion,
does it know I speak through it when my own words escape me?
the floor slips up my tongue
and my memories are burned into my eyes
I am left looking into your eyes.
Your eyes that are not there.
I burn the edges again like the photograph that was in my hand.
and I feel, it was worth it in the end
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Review
Stay awake was just a random idea that popped in my head that I wanted to write down, and this poem was a combobulation of words that have been in my head that came out this way, there is no back story to it, just it.